Milton Saint vs The World
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Gump of Steel (Forrest Gump and Man of Steel Mashup)
Today is my day off, so as usually I planned on cleaning my apartment, exercising, general seizing of the day type shit and then coming home and cooking. However, today I have only managed to watch old episodes of Digimon, read a few comics, somehow stumble across porn and masturbate to it, then fall back asleep … Continue reading
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This post is the story of a criminal that goes by the name Milton Saint. Though he is anything but a Saint. (Sorry for the name pun… it was a lame pun. Okay… sorry for that too.) Year: 2008 Month: March As a nineteen year old Milton Saint felt as though he had the whole … Continue reading
So you guys were there for my last post right? Right….? No? Alright here it is. Okay did you read it now? No serious you need to read that it’s like my least viewed post but has the most likes. I’m confused by that, whatever. Alright so here it is again. Did you read it … Continue reading
Hi… this is me starting a blog with a clever opening that draws the reader in and what not…. I joined the Navy with three goals in my 19 year old mind, none of which have been met with satisfaction. The goals were: Hook up with random bitches. I failed at this upon realizing that … Continue reading
I’m not sure if I’ve dropped enough Harry Potter references to make you guys realize that I’m a COMPLETE Potter Head… but I am. Not because I’ve read all the books several times and seen every movie but I also own a few of Harry’s school books from the series. I’ve bought as much Hogwarts … Continue reading
Dear Albus, First I’d like to set the proper tone for this letter and say, FUCK YOU. You don’t deserve to be named after the wisest wizard of all time and Harry Potter’s mentor Albus Dumbledore. I’m not sure why my girlfriend thought this was an appropriate name for a cat but what’s done is … Continue reading
When I was younger I was a real man! Granted this was in between the ages of 16-21 that I’m referring to but I was ALL about drinking, partying, bitches, and being a general dumbass. A fucking awesome dumbass! If I was dared to do some shit my response was always, “Fuck no! What do … Continue reading
I love meat… (no homo I guess) it just taste awesome and you can’t go wrong with bacon as I’ve said time and time again. However, I am against animal cruelty cause that’s just fucked up and I feel like people who take joy in torturing animals are borderline serial killers or some shit. I’m sure … Continue reading
Well… Black History Month has ended for this year… so now I’m guessing we go back to… White History Year? Excuse me, October IS Hispanic Heritage Month so there’s that. But what the hell is the point of these months? I’m mostly gonna question the purpose of Black History Month… because I’m black… and I … Continue reading
I’m not gonna lie. I’ve been guilty of sagging in the past. I was a teenager and I actually thought it was cool. However, in my defense, I was never that extreme when I sagged, in fact, you would have never known I was sagging. See when I was younger if I sagged then I … Continue reading
Bacon is amazing. I could end the article there but my soul will not rest until I talk about bacon for a lot longer. In fact, my soul will never fully rest because I literally can not talk about bacon enough. I’m even gonna post a video on my Youtube channel when I find the … Continue reading
Updates
- I'm not trying to brag but... I just opened a beer bottle with a CD! As in a compact disk!! It's shattered but I'm drinking beer soooo... win and win! No details for now but I might post a video later. Update: I have two bottles to open.... time to find more ways to open a beer bottle.
- So... random as fuck my friend/boss/mentor Brian invited me to a Brooks and Dunn concert. Now as my blackness has already been in question several times before I was hesitant. Then he said he has two VIP tickets for my girlfriend and I. Now I like the idea of balling but at a country concert?.... Fuck it... I'm down!!
- I'm very grateful to have gained over 400 subscribers and 2,500 views these past three weeks. I've even had someone stop me in person to tell me how much they love my blog. But now I feel pressure to uphold a standard, which in turns makes it harder for me to write. Obviously all my past posts have a sense of, "this guy doesn't give a fuck." Now I feel like I need to cater to the fans that I do have... actually... fuck that. Writer's block can kiss my ass. More post coming soon!
- I'll make another post tomorrow... Maybe even two! Thank you for your concerns, e-mails, etc. I promise they'll be good ones, well that's opinion, but either way. Good night. Oh and I've hit 468 followers and almost 2,000 views. Remember the goal is 5,000 by June.
- So I finished 2011 with only 406 total views on this blog... five days into 2012 I've already hit 1,000 views which was my goal for the entire year. Next milestone? 5,000 views by June maybe?
- Earlier I had 400+ views for all of 2011. Today I have 587 with 143 of those for coming from today. Now I'm gonna act like I'm too good for you people. Nah, seriously thanks for reading and/or showing interest.
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